Friday, April 17, 2009

Struggling to Accept

The loneliness is back, and it's not going away.

How much longer can I pretend that everything is okay?

Still fighting the fear that after all this, I will still lose you.

I keep having to remind myself that you love me - and you really do, but I still have to remind myself of it.

You said you don't want a break-up, and it doesn't look like a break-up, but it feels like a break-up and it hurts like a break-up.

I want to just surrender and be dead to pain... Or go into a deep sleep and wake up just in time for us to reconnect, or get back together, or whatever the opposite of "break" is.

I'm no longer your angel; angels don't have broken hearts.

I want to cry and sleep and sleep and cry and cry and sleep and sleep and cry...

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